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 - Charles Laffere   

MEMORIES… OR MEMOREX? 

Nothing like the trademark VinceKM ellipsis for an opening…

(Ed. Note:  Ha.  Ha.)
 

“Nuclear arms in the Middle East
Israel is attacking the Iraqis
The Syrians are mad at the Lebanese
And Baghdad does whatever she please
Looks like another threat to world peace
For the envoy”
 

“The Envoy,” by Warren Zevon. 

Warren, I wish that was the solution.

Hello everyone, and welcome back to the spring edition of my Kayfabe Memories of the Universal Wrestling Federation. I am still Charles Laffere, and it is great to be back here with all of you who kindly take the time to read. Last time, we were entering the mid-card of the promotion’s Superdome Extravaganza on November 27, 1986. I had planned to continue recapping the night’s action, but a couple of things happened in the interim to make me change the plan.  First, a friend of mine and fellow Mid-South/UWF aficionado was generous enough to grace me with a UWF compilation tape. Wow. I’m getting a Sally Field vibe here. I mean, you like me. You, really, REALLY like me… 

“Step right up, be a man
You need faith to understand
So we're saying for you to hear
Keep your head in faith's atmosphere...
 

Keep your head to the sky
Keep your head to the sky”
 

“Keep Your Head to the Sky,” by Earth, Wind & Fire

The second thing that piqued my interest for our column today was, well, my lack of interest in the current wrestling product, i.e. WWE.  Today’s wrestling angles have a shelf life at maximum of 30 days or the next pay per view, whichever comes first.  The argument can be made that this is necessitated by the structure of the business, but the quick resolutions to feuds and storylines leaves me with a kind of fast food feel—they might fill you up for awhile, but they’re usually not very good and easily forgettable.  There’s no opportunity—or is there? —within the current system for classic feuds such as the one between Jose Lothario and Gino Hernandez in Houston. Those two waged a war of words and deeds for several months before they ever hooked up in the ring in one-on-one competition. It was human drama, provoking genuine emotional reactions for fans, that wasn’t some neo-Pavlovian tripe concocted by Grade D screenwriters or the boss’s daughter. But I’m digressing here…             

“All you slingers and fiends
Hide behind your rocks
Put down your gloves
I'm not here to box
This is no showdown
So throw down your guns
You see it doesn't matter
Where you come from…”
 

“Fight Like a Brave,” by the Red Hot Chili Peppers. 

So what does all this have to do with Bill Watts and his wrestling promotion? By the time of the name change and national move in 1986, the UWF was best promotion in the United States. Watts moved the territorial “home” from Mid South’s “mothership,” the Irish McNeill Boy’s Club in Shreveport, Louisiana to the more expansive Fairgrounds in Tulsa, Oklahoma and Billy Bob’s in Fort Worth, Texas. As the illustrious Scott “loaded glove” Williams has recently stated on the UWF KM Message Board, the move of the television base was necessary to project the image of a “big-time feel” to correspond with the promotion’s direct effort to compete the Vince McMahon and the World Wrestling Federation…   More...

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